They say I'm hopless....
As a penny with a hole in it

Yeah, that's how I feel, just plain hopeless. I have done so badly in school this semester. I am so ashamed of my performance, because I know that I can be a straight A student, for real. I could be pullin a 4.0 gpa right now, but I'm not. My gpa is nowhere near 4.0. I just can't believe what I've done to myself. I feel so defeated. Part of me wants to never go back to school. Just give up. But then I know that I'll never make anything of my life. Part of me wants to take a semester off, or maybe even a year. But I hate that. I hate when people take time off of school for no reason. What would my reason be?? To 'clear my head'? No, my head is clear enough, just a bit unfocused though. Part of me wants to take next semester by the neck and wring all A's out of it. Yes, that is what I want to do, and that is what I shall do. No matter what it takes. If I have to quit my job, then so-be-it because my education is a top priority. I'll say it's number 2 on my list. Number one is of course, God and my spiritual life. Number 3 is work/money. High on the list, yes, but not more important than my education. So, I'm trying not to dwell too much on my failure in school, because the way I see it, the semester is over now, and there is nothing at all that I can do about it, so why worry. Why even bother to dwell on it? It will do me no good.

But, next semester, it's on like a pot of neckbones, in the early morn', till the break of dawn, oh, I could go on and on.... (= Cuz, really, it ain't no thing but a chicken wing on a string from Burger King that sings on a swing, know what I mean??

I haven't seen Kalvin. I want too. I wish he'd come right now and sit at the computer next to me, and play some games. Then I'd talk to him, find out his real name and some other stuff about him. I have it all planned out....

I made a peach cobbler!! Peach cobbler is absolutely one of my favorite foods and I made one yesterday. My grandmother taught me how the last time she came down. (She always makes me peach cobbler) I kinda remembered how to do it, I had bought the ingredients, and yesterday I was like eh, why don't I make it now. It was funny, I didn't really know how much to put of what so I'd be like "Hmm, I think I remember vanilla *shrug* *pour*. Nutmeg?? yeeea, there was some of that *shrug* *dash dash*. Hmm, how thin should the crust be? Um, maybe a little more milk in that *eyebrow raise* *pour*.
Anyhow, it turned out really good, and I can't wait to make another one. Knowing me, I'll probably be making one like, every week. lol. Ridicoulous. Maybe I should give everybody peach cobbler for Christmas. I mean, it's a heck of a lot better than fruitcake. Ok, I think I have said enough, even though I have so much more to say, but I don't want to tire youall's eyes out.
OH, WHAT THE HEY....
I know now what I'm getting 5 of my friends for Christmas. I have covered Ali, KaReisha, Therese, Ash and Martina (that's right, Martina, I'm gonna get you something. Don't be surprised to see your name). I have soooo much more to go. I don't know what to get my mother or sister. hm. I sold back some of my books today and so I have a little bit of money to spend, I'm gonna go shopping tomorrow. I hope Son' can come with me!!

I guess I really didn't have that much more to say huh?