Tuesday, October 10, 2006

I cried today
-because I'm almost there
-because I don't know if I'm ready
-because I can't believe it
-and all she was doing was critiquing my resume
-and it made me feel so embarrased
-and it was so strange
-and maybe i shouldn't have
-and I probably had every right to
-because they think it's cancer
-because I can't cure cancer
-because I don't know if I can raise my GPA
-because I know I can raise my GPA
-because I know I have potential
-because I have so much to do
-because I'm happy
-because I'm proud of myself
-and I think it's because I'm on my period
-and it made me feel all girly and crap
-because of the little girl inside of me
-in front of that woman!
-and maybe I should do it again, but next time alone

Sunday, October 08, 2006

Today=Another Good Day
-This is about nothing.

I was looking at some thing online, I believe it was some type of horoscope birthday thing, and do you know what it told me? Hm, do you?

Of course you don't, but let me tell you. It said that I am a capricious lover. I
was taken aback!!
I was appalled!
I didn't know what capricious meant, but it musn't be good right?
Capricious: Characterized by or subject to whim; impulsive and unpredictable. He's such a capricious boss I never know how he'll react.

*grin* who meee?

Well, I think they were right. Now, I don't know too much about my characteristics as far as being a lover goes, because I don't mess with that L stuff, but I can identify this capriciousness (?) in my everyday life. That's why people don't get me, because I can't be gotten.

But I want someone to get me. I want someone to perhaps understand my capriciosness, and be able to attribute any irrational behavior to it. After all, am I really to blame? It's a personality flaw. . . or maybe it's not a flaw at all.

Annnyyyywhooooo, my new Boo *smilez* wants to take me to Peoria to celebrate my birthday. I'm a lil excited, but you know I don't do the excitement thing to much, so I'm just playin it cool. yup *sniff*.
I'm thinking that he might have the capacity to identify my capriciosness, but that he may very well posess that same quality deep down inside. Scary, cuz I can't deal with that mess. I hope we have a good time in P-town though, all capricious qualities aside.

P.S. I give thanks to the creator, giver, and sustainer of life for the blessings and balance that has been bestowed upon me. I request that you accept my offering of gratitude, given with a humble heart, as I am most grateful.